“Just like moons and like suns, With the certainty of tides, Just like hopes springing high, Still I’ll rise.” Maya Angelou
I never give myself enough credit for overcoming situations in my life. I would focus more on what I lost than the good times in fear that they would end. I realise dwelling on the sad stuff was robbing me of the happiness which I created for myself and the potential for future happiness.
Why am I conditioned to fixate on that? I need to let go on the things that no longer serve me, and that is on the top of the list. I’m working on admiring the beauty of the garden as opposed to the flower that got crushed. I will always face disappointments, that’s a side effect of being alive, but how I react to it will affect future blessings.
I am such a blessing, and I should start acting this way. No amount of rubble can keep me from getting to the top. Getting comfortable should never be an option as it is the gateway to mediocrity. I know I deserve better in life; the battle is not listening to the voices that tell you otherwise.
I am more than my present circumstance, so I’m working on getting on the journey I want in my life. There will always be something preventing me from where I want to go; I just have to find a way around it to get back on the path.
Having the patience to wait for the things you deserve, while putting in the word, and believing in yourself are the two greatest tools you need to succeed. Not many people will understand your end game and such will try to deter you from finishing. Know yourself inside and out so that you will be able to overcome any hurdle that comes your way.
I know that you got this, you just need to start believing wholeheartedly!
I have this friend that continually calls me a girl even though I remind them that I don’t identify with that word. They didn’t seem to understand the idea behind it, but I felt the need to explain my stance to prevent any further confusion. So the story goes like this:
“I made a conscious effort not to refer to myself as a girl anymore under any circumstances. Most people thought it was weird, but I connected the word girl with childish and finite things, and I didn’t want to associate myself with that any longer. I associated woman with growth, success, etc. and thus wanted to attract all these things, plus more, into my life.
When I made the transition from girl to woman, I had this metaphysical change. I was more willing to embrace changes as well as accomplish the goals I set out for myself. My poise changed and I became more graceful. You may not think that this was the only reason, but it was indeed the first flap in the butterfly effect. I am glad I made this decision!”
In life, you need to do what is best for you, and this was a great win for me.
I was scrolling through facebook and I was reminded about something I posted a year ago. It was a poetry project I had completed; I research the meaning of my names and wrote a descriptive paragraph about myself. Looking back at it now, I have to say that I have maintained the level of growth I wanted for myself. I have maintained:
my diet (what I consume in all aspects of my life)
my energy and the steps needed to protect it
My Name: Unfolded
The lioness knew that the light within her would guide her through the midst of uncertainty. Her wisdom would assist those who had lost their strength along the way. She fought hard to maintain the honour and victory within herself, never ceasing to forget her rock.
Growing up, I always heard the saying cleanliness is close to Godliness. I always thought that was my mother’s way of getting me and my siblings to clean the house and yard every day. Keeping the place so clean that all will be right in the universe. As I grew older, I realised I should apply this to every aspect of my life. Keeping my body clean so I would obtain my weight goal plus I would have the stamina to do all the activities I want to do. Keeping my soul clean; this meant getting rid of all of the burdens that kept me stuck for so long. Keeping my mind clean; realising my worth and fullest potential so that the world can experience my greatness.
As mentioned in a previous blog, I had lots of regrets growing up. These regrets stemmed from allowing fear to be the final “person” in the decision-making process. So many missed opportunities because I allowed myself to be caught up in the belief I wasn’t significant enough. There were some times I couldn’t help it; I heard so many negative things said that it became ingrained within me. Sometimes no matter how good nature is if the nurture is toxic, it still affects a child’s psyche. Having all these thoughts did weigh me down to the point where I would feel so heavy but couldn’t pinpoint the problem.
I always wondered when was it going to be my turn because I felt that I was putting in the effort but getting no results. In retrospect, I realised that I was producing the energy based on my belief system but not my capabilities. I conjured negativity into the world with my thoughts and words. I never knew I was the one holding myself back. I wish I had known to be kind to myself to reach my potential and believe in my myself to foster the growth I needed. One thing I wished for growing up was a mentor. Talking to someone about your life’s plan is essential; having conversations about future goals, life, fears, insecurities, etc. take the pressure off and help you realise you are enough. Speaking out is one way to conquer fears, which is one of the critical steps to becoming your highest self.
Although I wish I had a chance to change many things, I am glad my life took this course. I learnt a lot of things along the way and met people who have forced me to be openminded. I truly understand how life keeps presenting us with challenges until we learn our lesson. Instead of blaming myself for taking so long to figure it out, I thank myself for having the opportunity to find myself.